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I Know Why the Chicken Crossed the Road!!

So, one day our little chicken got brave and started to cross the road. She would start to see that the grass was greener on the other side. Like. For Real.

No grass was growing in our front yard because everyone started parking in our front yard because if you park in the street, that was the end of your vehicle. Finito. The end. Dead. Your car would get totaled. They park in our yard and our whole front yard ended up being a parking lot. Well, if your parking lot is a dust or mud parking lot that is.

Now, I don’t know a lot about grass. Or growing things. Or much of anything, really. But when you park on lawns, things don’t grow. I do know that. I also know when chickens graze – they look for bugs. Bugs like grass. See my point.

So, our chicken learned quickly that it needed to see the grass on the other side of the road…it was greener.

See, I’m killing all the clichés. For real.  Ok, not all.

So, the grass was greener on the other side.

My chicken was crossing the road to see what was on the other side.

This was my life.

My chicken was crossing the road to see what was on the other side. This was my life.

People would stop their cars as to let the chicken cross the road. Otherwise, they would kill it.

Chicken killers. Honestly.

However, I don’t think anyone ever thought they would wake up and think, “oh, I’m gonna kill a chicken today”. Well, unless if you grow up on a chicken farm or if you are in a deli and that’s what you do.

Now, most chickens would lay eggs in the same area, the coop. If you are paying any attention at all, you see that she is not your normal chicken. So it shouldn’t surprise you that she didn’t lay eggs the normal way.

Now I’m a therapist and I’ve thought about this. I’ve wondered…maybe when her mama laid her egg she got knocked in the noggin, or when her egg was hatched she didn’t get enough oxygen or maybe she is extremely smart and she is an independent chicken and has the business intelligence equivalence of Bill Gates or she thought out of the box and could have cured bird flu or something crazy like that. She could have been a Chicken Mogul or something…and she was stuck with us. Poor thing. We really brought her down.

However, she was an “out of the box chicken” that’s for sure. She didn’t lay eggs in her coop, or not very often anyway. She preferred to lay them ALL over the yard, in random places…like she was the Easter bunny. We would be mowing in the back yard where there was grass and an egg. I would be picking up sticks (not waving at anyone this time cause I’m not going to do that again) and there is one in the dirt. My husband would be getting his motorcycle out to get ready to ride and there would be one on the seat, then one in the tool box of the garage.

Do chickens do that? She was strange.

Did I have another point to this?I feel like I did.

I feel like I did.

I’m not sure it mattered because the fact I had an Easter Egg laying chicken was pretty cool.

Where was I going with this…dogs, squirrel neighbor, ARL. Oh ya. Our neighbor didn’t like our free range chicken because it could be in danger. Honestly she was. She was going crazy. I could see crazy in her eyes and be arriving every day more at that diagnosis.

Our neighbor didn’t like our free range chicken because it could be in danger.

Honestly, she was. She was going crazy. I could see crazy in her eyes and be arriving every day more at that diagnosis.

One day we came home with a yellow sticky note on the door “Chicken at Large”, Signed, but the ARL. Really. By now you are thinking this is nothing but posts about the ARL, that’s not true. Just appears that way. So, we’ve been ticketed with “Dog at Large” and now “Chicken at Large”. Apparently, the chicken was caught going across the street and it was called in. Seriously, I can’t make this stuff up. The story is the ARL professional was trying to catch it, but couldn’t. Ya, you can’t catch a chicken.

UNLESS you are getting her in the truck to take her to get some Kentucky Fried Chicken.

SORRY. Bad joke.

But the photo was her in the truck with us on the way to get something to eat..so it was sorta true.

 

 

 

Author:

Photographer, mother of 6, therapist, traveler and blogger.

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